Itsbeentendays, huh? (Somehow I just didn't feel like clicking the unfairly long space bar button. Okay la, unfair for the keyboard's world. I'm good okay, I know how non-living things feel, but sadly, not how living things think/feel.
I'm so frustrated of everything around me, that's happening to me. I'm so tired, I wanna cut or chop myself into half.. (No just kidding that's kinda creepy.) I'm not taking BK already, I went for the first BK class but it really seemed like there's a lot to study. My results for the first monthly tests were.. VERY BAD. Exactly, how can I score if I take BK. :/ I'm not as smart as you all think I am. I'm.. actually a very blur kid.
Okay.. back to the I don't know how living things think/feel. How would I know?! It's so weird how people think so differently, how they react.. This post is getting emotional, but I'm gonna continue.
I think I've been cheated for like three times? Just thought I should start talking about my love story. TROLOL. Not like I had any serious relationship, I mean, NOT LIKE I had any boyfriend or fake relationship ALSO..
It was on the first night.. (WHAT??). It was on a Saturday, 23rd of June 2007. Yup, I met this very.. guy. :) And I don't know why I just liked him. He had two girlfriends that time.. at the same time (wtheeeeeeeck, I know right?), which one of the relationships was catogarised as not-so-serious relationship, another one, well, serious relationship. (I know!) but I just liked him no matter what. One of his friends told me that he liked me.. HAHHAHA, and he was having two girlfriends. (which obviously truth already told me I would get hurt but I still talked to him anyway.) Then he broke up with his so called girlfriends after he went to secondary school. We went to the same tuition to meet each other, and he was known to be my dream lover.. And it was funny. :D Right, I liked him like crazy, I was always feeling so excited to go for that particular tuition. After that, because of not seeing each other for quite a long time, his feelings for me faded. (yes..) after breaking up with his girlfriend (anyway that was the first time he cheated on me.), he came back to me and we started talking to each other day and night. (I KNOW I KNOW I'M STUPID) It happened for 3 times already. I'm so sure it's gonna happen again but I still forgave him anyway. It's kinda heart breaking to know that he's such a so not loyal person. But truth is,
I LIKE HIM ANYWAY. I'm just gonna continue to be a stupid person, NO.
I always tried my best to not FORGIVE this guy but every time, EVERY TIME I failed. What am I supposed to do? I can't love anyone else? I want to try out some other person but wouldn't it be annoying? Therefore, I.. I'm just gonna live my life for God and put Him in the first place in my heart.
Choong Yew Han, it's not easy to move on you know? I never liked anybody else except this guy. It's already like my routine for almost five years. I hate that I like him. I don't really feel happy but I like him. Shiz, I don't want to, anymore.
I want to be free! I NO WANNA LIKE THIS GUY. But he's not going anywhere from my heart. He's such a jerk. :/
Even when I was typing or talking about how I met him, I smiled. Silly me.
I guess I should stop. This SHOULD stop.
Never wanted this post to be like this, but stories FTW! :)
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