"look back & learn"

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I remember how Sarah mentioned how we should always be convicted because of what He has done. I'm just so thankful that in 2010 (if I'm not mistaken), I accepted Christ. One thing I can be sure of is this - that accepting Him into my life is one of the greatest events that had happened in my life.

But, today, it wasn't a very good day for me, although I'm still really thankful that I'm alive, but I do believe that tomorrow will be a better day.

What you do today is important because you're exchanging a day of your life for it. Let it be something good!

I'm not sure where this Felix got it from, or maybe it's originally from him, but it's inspiring so I share it with you people. ;)

Well, what really happened today. I actually got a little bit disappointed to know that all my tiny little post in each club doesn't help me to achieve anything from the outside. Deep down I know what I've gained -experiences- are more than enough to replace the certificates, glory, etc, but honestly, i was just a tiny bit disappointed. Then, I just didn't really care about it and moved on. I got a little sad to know that I'm actually VERY VERY short #ohmygoodnessjellyburgerfishcake when I had to position myself as the 3rd person from the back and had to stand right at the side during CF photo taking session. I then, honestly, just wanted to kill myself already (kidding) - I was trying hard to tip toe hoping someone would rearrange the position but meh, i was just torturing myself. What I was really sad about was that, when Rueben was so shocked that I was a committee member in CF. (One of the worst things that can happen is - your presence never fell - which it also sadly means you haven't been doing anything that's why people never noticed you until, photography session.)

That was the moment when I started thinking how I've done so little for each of the society I'm involved including my house, because (one of the reasons I've found for myself to feel a little less guilty) I really couldn't concentrate on only one society, I tried my very best to even out so that each society gets some of my contributions but unfortunately it really means I'm irresponsible for all the jobs I should've done but was too lazy/ busy to do them.

It's funny how people say my height is fun size but I don't really agree with it. I'm still striving to grow taller. I mean, how can anyone so short live. (Not like I need to be dead either) - I just really need to be at least, a little bit taller than I am now.

So what really makes me sad today? I was kinda sad I didn't feel belonged in CF. I guess I know how Vui Yean feels? The whole bunch of Form 4s were almost glued together, it felt so much like they didn't want anyone else to interrupt them having their fun times, so whenever you try interacting with them they will give you the cold glare. Okay lah, I shouldn't generalize, Jen Yee, Sophia and Edward are reasonable people. I don't know, I just felt so bad there. But when I got back to class and I saw Kyleen, I was kinda grateful then.

And I was grateful for the guys in my class too. They have made me raised my voice, but they have, nonetheless, also made my days with their laughters. (I feel like they are trying hard to impress other people with their really lame jokes - which I never laughed at. -____- although I know their desire is to have their jokes get laughed at.)

I think I'm done here since it's 12:05am already.

I hope the promposal tomorrow (later) will go smoothly. I'm so excited although I know the answer is probably a 'no'. ;) *winks.